SPOTLIGHT: MEG ELSIER

Photo By Jacq Justice

Meet Meg Elsier and tune into her new single “sportscar [scrapped]”

You’ve said “sportscar [scrapped]” almost belonged to a completely different version of spittake. Looking back now, how do you think the song reshapes the narrative of the album within the deluxe edition?

Hmm…I think adding “sportscar” highlights different themes from spittake that have always been there but just slightly out of focus. There’s the obvious fact that I mention cars a lot on spittake (like in “youngestchild,” “forlyleinsanfrancisco," “eastside,” etc.), but this song really reinforces the emotions I had tied to something I kind of hated doing (driving - I'm a passenger princess 4 ever). During this time I could see the shifts and changes I was having, whether I wanted to or not, very obviously in cars. And I think that seeped from my subconscious into my writing because who actually knows what they’re writing when they’re writing it?

The imagery of the car as a metaphor for your own life is so vivid in this song. When did you first connect that symbolism to your personal experience, or did it reveal itself through writing the track?

I think it’s both to be honest. I had a few life-changing moments that happened in and around cars so I became looped on it for years. Knowing that’s a factor, I understood why it was popping up in my writing. Or maybe it was less understanding and more noticing. It wasn’t until I noticed it in multiple songs that I really started connecting with and understanding why it meant a lot to me and what It represented to me.

There’s a really striking build in “sportscar [scrapped],” from quiet reflection to this huge, energized chorus. How intentional was that structure in mirroring your emotional state at the time?

100% intentional. My producer Ryan McFadden and I really love creating the atmosphere and the song structure and tones to reinforce the lyrics and what is going on emotionally in the song. It’s a way to have subliminal understanding. It’s like your brain understanding devastating lyrics, but your heart twists a certain way because every instrument goes away and it’s just a barren wasteland with a broken voice ringing. I think it also makes me feel more honest and more understood when I can give context, not by words or telling people what it means to me.

You mentioned playing with the idea of naming the album Check Engine Light On before landing on spittake. Do you ever wonder how differently people might have interpreted the album with that title?

Oh, for sure I think the title spittake really just represents everything I’m saying in that title track. This cynical, sad, yet comical moment of realization of the joke of an existence I have. I feel more connected to it because it has a sense of self-awareness and, I don’t want to say defeat, but something along those lines. It’s a cruel joke, and I know I can’t do anything about it. There is an eerie calmness that comes with spittake; whereas check engine light on is more on the precipice of coming to that conclusion. Everything is falling apart and I kind of know why, but I have no idea what is in store. And by the time all of the writing was done and we decided to put “spittake” on the album, I was past the point of waiting for everything to crumble or see where it’ll die on the road. spittake was more honest about where I was.

The lyric about putting on a new coat of paint or taking the car to the wash feels like such a sharp reflection of how we perform for people socially. Was it freeing or nerve-wracking to expose that part of yourself so directly?

Neither? Both? Everything? Nothing? Exposing myself like that is way more word vomit than getting ready to share a side of myself that I struggle with. But I also feel like I get the most connection with people when I just say what I mean and share what’s in my head. Writing is one of the only places where I’ll hide some complete unfiltered honesty amongst complete and utter LIES... so I guess there's the nerves before you share it, and then you hope it’s met with understanding.

The live visual for this track pushes the idea of performance beyond the typical rock show. You’ve described it as “theatre” and “camp.” Why do you think the indie-rock space still hesitates to lean into theatricality?

I think it’s because theatre kids get a bad rep. Just kidding! I actually feel like there’s a big swing in that direction in the indie world right now!! Visuals have always been heavy in pop, but I think there was maybe hesitation to add those elements into something that seemed more like the underbelly. Something that just wanted to prove its integrity by itself. But seeing live shows like Japanese Breakfast or the set that Clairo builds out, I really think things are moving in that direction for indie artists.

For me personally, it’s just a continuation of the song. It’s building out the world it lives in. It’s context but taking it slightly out of reality. It can still leave room for anyone to feel what they need to and project what they need to. I do think some people think theatrics can distract from what they’re saying, but for me music is always the heart of everything. Maybe visuals and theatrics, the costumes, the sets, the blocking, the movement, are the body?

You worked with Jacq Justice again on this project. How has that creative relationship evolved, especially as your vision for your visuals keeps getting bigger?

Jacq is my best friend and one of the most important relationships in my life. That has always been the core of everything we make. Finding someone who wants to make as weird of shit as you do is rare and something we instantly connected on. I have complete trust in her visioning intention. I feel we have this understanding that is fated. Working with her so much and being so close really gave me an environment to slowly learn how to shed that layer of fear of judgement or looking silly. I don’t think I would have half the skills or confidence I do with performing without being shown that I deserve the space and attention to do it at the level I want. Trying your hardest and being willing to make choices that people won’t necessarily connect to to find the ones who really do - I think that has been one of the things I’m most proud of that I take everywhere and that I learned by creating in this way.

spittake already has such an emotionally raw tone to it. What made now feel like the right time to expand the album’s world with this deluxe edition?

Picture this: I asked you out. Maybe you asked me out? No, I asked you out. Our first date was CUTE. Quirky. Silly, embarrassing. But we’re texting still. And you smile every time you look at your phone. We’re flirty, we’re fun, it’s light. That’s where I feel like we were at the end of the album release. But now I feel like I want y’all to know me MORE and I want to share more. And I just want to follow that genuine urge because I do not feel that way all the time.

The deluxe includes demos, live cuts, B-sides—it feels very much like peeling back the curtain on your process. Were there any songs or versions you were nervous to share with people in such an unfinished state?

I think everything about this made me nervous. I'm terrified to release the deluxe, but I've had enough time to curate and really linger on what I wanted to say and come across as. It’s like when you first become friends with someone and you spend time trying to impress them or still have this guard up because you don’t want their impression of you to shift. But eventually you have to mess up or get in a fight or get drunk and cry in a bathroom because a certain song came on that reminded me (I mean, you) of a college moment. You have that initial connection and now you want it to be deeper. That’s why I made the deluxe. I wanted to get deeper. But I think “sportscar [scrapped]” was probably the track I had the most nerves for. Just because that was a song that was consciously cut and so no one had heard before. With the demos—as scary as it is to release something that is a rough sketch—I think it’s so interesting to hear how these songs grew with time and collaboration.

As a listener, I have to say I love the design of the vinyl sleeve, the gatefold, and even the pressing color choices. How involved were you in the packaging and physical side of this release, and what did that process look like?

Omg, thank you!!! Shout out KARINA!!! <3 I was part of the design every step of the way!! Getting to send texts back and forth with Karina about design elements and layout was literally a dream. And the fact that I get VINYL actually freaks me out! But we knew that spittake is so thought through and intentional in every aspect, so we wanted the design to have just as much attention and connect with the world. It’s another visual. It’s another aspect to play with. There are little details in the packaging that mean the world to me that maybe will go unnoticed by some, but the fact that it even gets added is such a treat and makes it so special.

There’s a really delicate tension in your sound—your vocals often feel sweet or ethereal, layered over production that leans gritty and raw. Has that contrast always been intentional for you?

I think it’s just what feels right. I think delicate and harsh tastes are so lovely together. There is a lot of projection from society about what a woman is and how a woman should act and look and behave. Growing up, I felt more applauded and more attention went into sounding pretty, delicate. I went to music school, so you’re taught to sound “right,” to sing properly and use technique. All of that has a place and is so lovely to have in your arsenal, but there was no way I could totally express myself living in that small side of “femininity”. It really clicked with spittake. I didn’t have to sound delicate when I didn’t feel it. I learned to yell with this album. I, for sure, found my scream.

You’ve drawn comparisons to the shoegaze and indie-pop space, but your work also feels rooted in classic alternative storytelling. Who were the artists shaping your sound when you were writing spittake?

Warren Zevon, Banana Yoshimoto and Kurt Vonnegut really influenced my writing style. I really felt inspired by the simplicity in the language they use. It was real and raw, but poetic. It was so emotional using so few words. It’s simple but allows so much room for personal emotions to run wild on the lyrics.

Sonically, we really were influenced by movie soundtracks. More how the instruments flow and get introduced and go away to highlight the story. You can visualize what is going on even without watching anything. And I think that inspired a lot about how we recorded and found the sounds for the album. A lot of that was the Blade Runner soundtrack, so a lot of Vangelis. "Mandy Love Theme" was HUGE and on repeat, and honestly “L’Amour Toujours,” the song at the end of Uncut Gems. That maybe just gave me energy to fucking make the record haha. I feel like a lot of the influences people can “hear” in spittake I learned while making it versus had in mind before recording.

Supporting Blondshell and now touring with Liz Cooper, how has being on the road influenced the way you approach your live performances, especially with your focus on theatricality?

For someone who wants to throw up before every performance—I fucking LOVE IT!!! There’s both fear and freedom in playing to people you do not know. In an environment you take over for 30 minutes or an hour or however long. I think I tap into an elevated self when on stage. Not really a character but maybe faking confidence until after the first song and then I’m FULLY in it. I tend to scream and shrill and fangirl on stage just as much as people in the audience. I think theatrics are in performance now, and in the future as soon as I can YOU KNOW I’ll be transported on that stage with sets and costumes and just a fucking show.

You’re based in Nashville, but your sound feels expansive, with threads of different scenes woven through it. How has Nashville shaped your identity as an artist, and where do you see yourself evolving next?

Nashville gave me confidence and time and space to grow and take the time to find who I was and how to share that with people. It was a place to learn and a place I NEEDED and gave me a community that I adore so much and is unlike any other. Nashville is so much more than just country music and there is so much to be influenced and inspired by. The people are unlike any other. That being said, I am a Northeast baby and a public transportation SLUT. I see a city move in my future very soon...

Lastly, you’ve been so open about burnout, identity, and the crash-and-burn cycle so many of us live through. With the deluxe edition and this new era, do you feel like you’ve finally fixed the “check engine light,” or is that still a work in progress?

FUCK NO, HAHAHHAHA. Maybe I’m in a rental car right now, shopping for a new car. For sure probably gonna stick to a Subaru. Either way, whether the check engine light is on or off, I’m gonna keep moving.

Stream sportscar [scrapped] here.